別れさせや “splitter-uppers”

I found this on the NY Times Freakonomics blog and was quite surprised when I read about it. The 別れさせや or “splitter-uppers” offers a very unique relationship service in Japan, and we’re not talking about that of the match-making variety. Rather this is a highly specialized sting-like operation with the intention of doing just the opposite: tearing relationships apart.

Imagine you have a relationship you want ended but somehow can’t find a way out of it. Instead of fessing up to the problem and dealing with it like any normal person, you call a team of skilled professionals whose job it is to stage the perfect situation so you don’t have to get your hands dirty. They set up an intricate series of events that lure your unsuspecting partner into a ploy that will eventually put him/her in the wrong and give you reason (and proof) to call it off. All this is provided at a premium rate of course.

Entrapment you say? Sure seems like it. But since in Japan entrapment really only concerns drug-related crimes, who’s going to care whether someone has been purposely set-up to be caught cheating on his/her partner (that is unless someone dies because of an operation gone wrong); what matters more is that the “cheater” was caught engaging in a socially unacceptable act. After all, in Japan it’s not necessarily about the truth, it’s about the image.

It would seem that the 別れさせや has Yakuza written all over it. However, with possibly over 270 similar establishments in Japan, it looks like this business is not only legitimate (to some extent) but also booming. Moreover, once you get down to the real reason why a demand even exists for such a service, you discover a more startling truth. In Japan, the divorce rate is still relatively low and this is due in part to the fact that such jurisdiction requires legitimate cause or “fault” (e.g. someone needs to be caught having an affair). It seems that you cannot divorce or separate on the grounds that you simply don’t get along or like each other any more. Add to that the Japanese-reverence for avoiding face-to-face confrontation, and you arrive at the 別れさせや, a perfect solution.

Surprising? Somewhat. Twisted? Very.

I guess Kosai Sekine’s Break-Up Service video is not far off from the truth of the relationship-ending industry in Japan. I just hope I never reach a point where I require the use of such a service.